I am kind of emotional right now. In the last twenty four hours Lisa has sent me a lot of pictures of herself, actually today when I came on there were four email's worth of them:) She is so adorable and the pictures are adorable and sexy and cute and funny and made me cry and I'm headed back to the tears again. I never knew just pictures could make me miss her so much and want her so much and hurt so much. I want to be the one she's hugging in the pictures instead of her friends, I want to be the one she is thinking with, and be beside her in the picture of her sleeping. Everyday that passes without her with me makes it feel like Australia is even further away. She is still so close in my heart and soul, always on my mind, but Aus just keeps getting farther and farther from me taking her with it. I don't want to be here anymore, I don't belong here anymore, I want to be where she is. Always. I don't want to be crying because pictures make me realize how far away she really is and that I can't just see her when I want, or talk to her when I want, or touch her when I want, I can't go to her when I am missing her and kiss her to be that much closer to her, I can't go to bed at night knowing that she will be the first person I see in the morning. There is so much I can't do with her, so much I want to do with her, so much my heart aches to say to her, and we're so far apart. I don't know when that will change, there is so much in the way of us being together and I don't have any powers to make it easier. I feel I'm going to drown in tears before I can hold her. She has the greatest smile thats lights up her face. Short hair looks so adorable on her. Her arms look so comfortable to be in. Her hands are great. Her body is gorgeous. And her pussy is so cute. Lmao, just kidding, it was really her friends pussy, hehe...I mean a cat here people, she was with a cat in the picture, get your minds out of the gutter;) Gawd everything about her I love and want to feel and see and touch but I'm so far away and all I have are great pictures, which I am very happy to have, but I want her in the flesh to. I can't really put into words what I am feeling right now, not the way I really feel them. I'm so lost here. I would give anything in the world to be there with her instead of here without her. If it didn't take an insane number of months now to get a passport, 6-8, I would be getting it and my visa and selling everything I have to get there. I'd sell my soul, but it's mate to hers and I would never give that up. She is everything to me and always will be. In ten day it will be a year and a half since we met. It's been both fast and slow and all I want is the time to fly by until we can be together and then slow to a crawl so we can feel every minute that goes by. I want nothing more than to just be with her and love her and cherish her and make a life with her. She is the only person in the world that I trust with everything and the only things I am scared of with her is that I will never be able to tell her how much I love her; we won't get a long enough life together; and/or she'll be disappointed when we meet. I hope we're together really soon, there are so many days now where I feel like crying for simple reasons that someone else is happy with their lover and I'm not with my love, or I hear or see her name somewhere or mention of Australia and it again makes me feel the distance between us. I'm a wreck inside.

Lisa, you made my life complete the day you entered it and everyday since you show me what all the goodness in the world is all about. With the love that I have for you and the love that I feel from you I know that through pain, hurt, darkness, and all the things that I haven't experienced in the world but are bad in someway, there is one thing that can make things all right, one thing that can lighten any heavy load, and one thing that makes everything worth while just to have it. That one thing, is love. Pure. True. Unconditional. Being in love with you has made this year and a half the best of my life and I wouldn't exchange it for anything. I love you more than anything and everything and I will spend everyday making sure you always know that. Thank you so much for being you and for letting me into your heart, I know it wasn't easy, but I do hope you feel it was worth it. We've stepped through each others safe walls and now stand on the inside, it will be a dark, lonely place inside if ever you step back out.

I love only you and miss you terribly though we are talking. Kisses sweetheart.