GUESS WHAT!!!!!!! I'm coming out to my mom TOMORROW and there is no way for me to back out of it this time. I can't believe I am FINALLY gonna do this and be out to her. I'm not at all nervous right now even though I know it's happening tomorrow night, and she knows something is coming tomorrow night, and she's thinking it's something very BIG. For all I know she could already be thinking this and I just gotta confirm it for her. I am so ready for this. And I am really happy right now and I know afterwards, no matter how it goes, I am going to be SOOOO happy and relieved. I can't wait. I want time to fly so I'm there and it's out and I'm out and we can deal with however she feels about it all.

I wanna tell her about my gurl tomorrow to. I know she won't go for the internet meeting part of it all, she will have doubts and worry about me but that part dont bother me cause I know my heart and I know my gurl's heart and I trust her with my life so I know I can trust her with my heart. But telling my mom about her depends on how she takes me being gay, if it turns out really bad which right now I know isnt going to happen then I will hold off telling her. But my mom said she just wants me to be happy above everything so I know she will be able to accept this because I am happy and if I can talk about my gurl to her tomorrow she will know just how completely happy I am.

It's amazing what my babygurl has done for my life, she is definately my saving grace in all ways. She's a big part of the reason why I am not nervous right now cause we talked this over earlier and she helped me out like she always does. Maybe I shouldn't need her as much as I do or say that she completes me and I couldn't live without her, just incase for some reason we don't work, but if I said differently I would be lying and I know that we will both do everything we can to stay together and happy. God I love her so much and I am so ready for tomorrow to come. Wish me luck...though I don't need it, haha didn't think I would be saying that when it comes to coming out to my mom. This is so friggin cool! Next time I write here I will officially be out!